Two Scotsmen, brothers, Finlay and Jim Calder, were sitting in the pub discussing Jim's big wedding day. 'Aye, it's going to be grand,' said Jim. 'I've got everything organised already, the flowers, the church, the cars, the reception, the rings, the minister, even ma stag night.' Finlay smiled and nodded, approvingly. 'Heavens, I've even got a kilt to be married in,' continued Jim with a look of satisfaction. 'A kilt... that's guid. You'll look smart in that,' exclaimed Finlay, 'and what's the tartan?' 'Och,' uttered Jim, 'I imagine she'll be in white.'